actually this is the real last entry.. the real mc coy.. mmm
I am glad i had this 1 month journey back to our ol'memories.. :) .. i am glad that you spare sometime to read it despite yer busy schedules and demanding working time.. thx for doing something thoughtfull, somethin different..
actually my head now is some sort on mode where it plays and plays all little things happened before we got married..
like when u said 'I LOVE U'.. i'd say 'THANK YOU'.. stupid robot-me..
like when u said something jiwa2.. i'd say yang i sakit perut, hari nak hujan..just wanna stop u saying stuffs u wanted..
oh, lupa . it was saya and awak during those days.. heheh..
'awak nak makan?' 'saya nak pergi tengok kedai tu kejab la, awak nak ikut?'.. heheh..
yup.. that's how the conversation sounded like..
i had no strategies those days.. i mean.. i went out with u because i needed to know u better, more needing to know why u wanna go out with me, what actually u see in me.. hahaha.. but somehow i just cant see a future of me playing wife, doting to kids.. hahaha, more wanna scare u off from thinkin that i'm a girlfriend material..it scares the last guy i dated before you,..haha... seriously serious. apatah lagi menjadi suri di hati, madame yang rule yer kingdom with an iron fist, hahahahahahaha.. i tipu..
i holded back.. because takut i lost you in the process..
i was never serious, because, i wouldn't bear to lick my wound if u just wanna play fool with me..
i was never see us beyond the particular days, because premeditated, there's no beyond for us..
that kind of thing just won't happened to me..
the thing we're having now, i mean.....
who wanna be serious with a loud awek,
yang most of the time raise brows,
keras kepala macam granite,
sepak kucing boleh mandul kucing dibuatnya
i've been called tingtong, perempuan gila, evil woman by guys. those from yg actually kawan buat lawak hari2, rakan sekelas.. heheh
kalau tak rapat, lagilah kan.. :) ..
actually i always prepare to spend my life being a spinster, hahaha, like i always said, if there's no right person, life goes on, sapa nak kawin out of necessity.. out of pressure because all my frens dah kawin..
turn out i was one of the earliest got hitched.. -snicker-
my mom said i'm lucky to marry you,
my sis said, she wanna somebody who will love her like u love me
some fren said that she's jealous for the things we have
the truth fact is,
it's the journey u decided to take,
no matter the nonsense i put u in
u make things happened for us
and me being gratefull, i just cant show u how much abundence it is..
u always said that you love me more than i would love you..
the real meaning never really dawned at me..
until I marry you..
so many things been said never really been much than it's mean literally to me..
until i felt it the way you felt it when u uttered it to me..
heart aching, heart throbing,
heart can give u myriad of weird funny hurtfull things like that, hehehe
curse u heart, mcmana nak jumpa doktor penyakit takdok ubat
jadik mcm jack nicholson dalam 'somethin's got to give'
maybe, maybe i was hundred steps behind you..
in feelings department..
but i'm gaining..
the next time u toleh,
i might be just at yer back
just like in salat
u'll be my imam, and i'll follow yer steps
that's a promise
oh, hubby dude said he looked like
chino marino burton c.bell apekejadah nama dia in this picture.. than i must be the groupie.. wow, i dated rockstar.. hahahaha.. gambar ini taken after hubby dude back from UK for good.. on our way back to Shah Alam from BP.. kat PLUS Hiway.. felt like yesterday kita pi naik tangga tak guna tuh kan, kat hiway somewhere kat Negeri 9 tuh, ingatkan scenic sgt ataih tuh, takdok apa yg menarik pon.. than we decided to take self picture.. this is my favorite picture eversince.. :)
thanks for make-a-do with the real me..
thanks for liking me just the way i am.. coz i'm not sorry being me
i learn tonnes from you.. am still learning, this is not how I remembered my letter should be, but this is how i felt writing it today.. :) ..
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY HUBBY DUDE, waiting to celebrate our marriage years to come..
p/s-hubby dude telah membetulkan nama rocker itu and i get to strike the name, yeeeeeeah for me.. KOG sila notice aku sudah guna tunjuk ajar.. :)